oh sweet surrender...

correction is a hard thing to take for some people.  honestly, i would venture to say to for most people it's hard. to have someone tell you that you are erring in an area of your life is not fun to hear. 

however, if it's done in a loving manner, that always helps. and it's always done in a loving manner when it's done by our Dad -- our Heavenly Dad that is. 

i don't know about you, but i have so many times in my life where God just simply quietly tugs at my heart - at my ear - until i'm ready to listen. He's patient. unlike me sometimes. He waits until i answer His pursue of my heart. sometimes it takes me awhile to answer Him - maybe because i have a slight idea what's coming... or perhaps it's just because i'm caught up in myself or my problems way too much instead of being caught up in HIM. regardless, He knocks. and waits. always.

you know those times where He knocks - and you answer - and you hear something like this: 

leave it in My hands. don't hold on to this. I can handle it. 

those are hard words for me to hear. i know He does it for my good. i'm thankful He speaks to me when i'm clinging to something too tightly. but i know that what follows those words from Him isn't going to be fun. 

when my fingers and arms are gripped so tightly around something, He has to slowly pry them off. 

finger by finger -- muscle by muscle, He gently loosens my grip.  all the while caressing my cheek saying:

child I know this hurts, but I can do it better than you. you put this in My hands, and watch what I can do. you'll see what i can make out of all this mess and hurt and pain, and it will be something marvelous.

He does it so i keep my eyes on Him - not on things of this earth. He does it so He can show me His glory and majesty. but even knowing all that, it doesn't take the pain away of surrendering. it hurts. a lot sometimes. but it's in those moments of surrender - of complete brokenness - that i am more than ever convinced of His love and that His hand is upon me holding me and guiding me through the tears. 

oh, Holy Spirit - continue seeking me and changing me from my filth to your majesty. 

prayer requests:

- for surrender in my life 

- for His hand to be upon the kids and staff here at CVE 

- for patience and love to flow from our hearts

- for wisdom in being able to discern what is our will/want and what His will is for us

- for Mom - she started her chemo today. pray for the medication to work effectively, having no problems with sickness/nausea, and for her heart to feel the grace, peace, forgiveness, and love of Christ

and i thought i'd leave you with a few pics of the trip-littles :-] 

 the first brown family picture! yay

somebody must have been being a weasel! :-]